Dear Me, 2020 Hates You


Mary Anton

Public beaches such as Kaloko Beach have seen a dip in visitors in March since the arrival of the mystery super virus.

If letters could be sent to past versions of yourself, the version of me that needs the most insight for the future would be me before 2020 came around. Refusing to take the universe’s signs to be more wary of its upcoming disasters have proven to be harmful. The message I would send the past me would look like this:

To the Dec. 31, 2019, edition of myself,

Avoid making the fatal mistake of thinking that 2020 will belong to you. On the contrary, you, along with the rest of this naive world, will belong to 2020.

Before the year reaches its halfway point, you will be experiencing humongous changes in your daily life that I have failed to adapt to. Expect major differences in your schooling, work, and the endless amount of free time. By following my advice, maybe you can tame the second half of 2020 and pilot it throughout the rest of the year.

The first change before anything else is going to be your outlook on the developing situation. It seems like the producers of 2020 were big “Power Ranger” fans with each episode featuring a new bad guy or monster. January was the month of the World War III scare, February the Australian wildfires, March a mystery super disease, April aliens, and now May killer frickin’ hornets. It’s easy to get overwhelmed and lose hope with each month trying to out-worse each other, so keeping a leveled head is key.

The second change that you’ll need to prepare for is your schooling. Imagine a semester where half of it is spent entirely at home due to some super virus. Though it sounds like a blessing at first, you will quickly realize how lazy you get when the options of doing classwork online on your desk and laying comfortably in bed are right next to each other. Classes becoming virtual means that you will be solely responsible for monitoring your progress. The good news in that scenario though is 30-minute bus rides to school and back are no more.

The third change that will effect you most is work. Similar to school, you, along with the entire island, will be out of work, which will transition seamlessly to you running out of money. The mountains of clothes that you plan to purchase as soon as you get your first check of the year should be saved for more important necessities like (get this) toilet paper. In order to sustain yourself, you will be introduced to a system that is just as unprepared for the downfall as you are. Expect staying up because you heard rumors about a website’s sweet spots only to be virtually elbowed out by the competition.

The last change that you will need to handle is the abundance of free time presented to you. Due to certain conditions, you are only allowed outside for around 10 hours a week. Sure this gives you time to catch up on shows and movies that you’ve been meaning to watch for the longest time, but with an entire day at your disposal, shows with seasons that are less than 20 episodes begin to sound short and unfulfilling. The most interesting event to happen during those times is finding a new comfortable position to rest your soulless husk.

Judging by its first five rounds, this 12-month gauntlet is proving to be a memorable one for all the wrong reasons. Natural disasters and shifty politics have become a reminder that we are ultimately small in a giant ever-shifting world. No matter how daunting that may be, however, it is important to set yourself in the best situation possible.

It would be a waste to see you handle the first half of 2020 like I did and end up in a cycling routine of misery and boredom. From here onward, as long as you promise to adhere my advice, I will be handling the rest of the year in a way where the 2021 edition of ourselves doesn’t have to write a letter telling me what I could have done better. Until then …

Yours Truly,

2020 Conrad