Donald Trump’s most ridiculous quotes

By James Meaney

With the looming election gaining more and more media coverage, both the educated and uneducated American have begun actively and annoyingly showing an interest in politics. More than a dozen presidential campaigns are now well underway with candidates making tours of the country in attempts to gain followers (both on and off Twitter).

With no clear front-runner or runners for next year’s presidential election, we can analyze some policies and quotes from the most “American” candidate in the 2016 election. The richly arrogant, derogatory racist Donald Trump has shed some light on how he thinks he can “Make America great again!” Believe it or not, some of his quotes have been great, but in more of a comical sense than a political one. Here’s a look at his best quotes, and by “best” I mean funniest. Because let’s face it, the whole campaign is a bit of a joke.

Donald Trump

Donald Trump on Jobs

“I will be the greatest jobs president that God ever created.” (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

It’s hard to decipher what he actually means here. My best guess would be that he is trying to say that he will create jobs for Americans, with God’s help? Luckily, however, we are able to figure out the target audience: It’s for the right wing, southern, still stuck in the 1800s traditionalist type. The sentence doesn’t make too much sense, either that or the genius Donald Trump has strategically dumbed down his sentence to appeal to the audience it’s designed for. Who knows? Trump probably doesn’t.

Donald Trump on Modesty

“Show me someone without an ego, and I’ll show you a loser – having a healthy ego, or high opinion of yourself, is a real positive in life!” (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

Low and behold the beauty of ignorance. Here, Donald Trump’s attempt of charismatic charm is about as ungraceful as his comb-over. The tarnished reputation of arrogant America pushed even further by Trump’s questionably delusional opinion of himself.

Donald Trump on “The Wall”

“I will build a great wall — and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me —and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words.” (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

Granted Trump does build fantastic buildings, and I’m positive he would do a brilliant job on building a wall. Now, Mr. Trump claims that Mexicans will pay for the wall, but is he aware that the POTUS doesn’t have access to the Mexican governments money? How exactly is he going to make the Mexicans pay for this wall? Is he just going to politely ask Mexico to pay? Imagine it, “Dear Mexico, build me a wall or you’re fired!” Is he confused with the Great Wall in China? He does talk about China a lot. I’m marking your words Mr Trump; I just do not understand them.

Donald Trump on China

“Their leaders are much smarter than our leaders, and we can’t sustain ourselves with that. It’s like, take the New England Patriots and Tom Brady and have them play your high school football team. That’s the difference between China’s leaders and our leaders.”  (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

“When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let’s say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. All the time.” (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

Trump has a very high opinion of himself, and since he is running for the presidency, we can assume that he quite fancies himself to be one of the country’s greatest leaders. So on one hand we have Trump admitting he isn’t as good as a Chinese leader, and on the other we have Trump beating China all the time. Now let’s put both hands on our head and look at the floor in utter bafflement as we pray to God that Trump doesn’t get a single vote in the 2016 election.

Donald Trump on Mexico 

“When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems to us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people!” (Announcement speech. June, 2015)

I don’t need to spend too much time on this one. This rich and racist, small minded man must be stopped. There is so much wrong with this statement it’s backwards. It’s hysterically backwards.

Donald Trump 

It’s easy; in fact it’s very easy to poke fun at Donald Trump, his presidential campaign has been financed off his own back with no original public backing. If his tour so far has proved any thing it’s that the media alone can help even the most talentless individual, move over Kim Kardashian, at least until 2020.

Somehow, Trump is currently leading the poles for the Republican Party, despite his irrational demeanor when addressing anyone who isn’t a right wing racist like himself. His remarks about Mexicans were inhumane; his policies are ill prepared and ignorant. His traditionalist-outdated views about everything are a step so far in the wrong direction that people might start celebrating the second amendment all over again. Too soon? When will it not be?

If you read this editorial hoping to gain an insight of Mr. Trump’s political polices then I’m very sorry I couldn’t be much help. If you did learn one thing from this though, it’s that when you vote next year, vote for America, and don’t vote for Trump. Mexicans won’t have to worry about it though; they’ll be too busy building the wall.