Top 7: Worst Halloween Costumes

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“I love clowns,” said no one ever.

By Ashley Onzuka, Staff Writer

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With Halloween just around the corner, finding a costume is urgent. For those who haven’t found a costume yet, before going to the costume shop or rummaging

through the closet, really think about what your costume should be. For those who have already found a costume, please continue to read the article below to ensure your costume avoids one of these regrettable mistakes.

1. Sexy Cat

On Halloween night there are hundreds of sexy cats prancing around with rhinestone cat ears, poorly drawn whiskers, and stiletto heels. Walking through Waikiki while wearing 5-inch heels must be a magical experience because nothing screams “Halloween spirit” more than a couple of blisters. As for the outfit portion of the costume, the color scheme is eye-pleasing and pure perfection because yes, that tight black skirt perfectly matches that tight black top. The make-up for the costume may vary but is never optional. For the most common look, “sexy cat make-up” consists of a sexy smokey eye, sexy false eyelashes, and a sexy lipstick color. Oh, and don’t forget to draw a few measly lines for whiskers and a little cat nose. Maybe she was born with it? Maybe it’s poorly drawn cat features. Fierce.

2. Chippendales

Females aren’t the only ones prancing around while wearing provocative and cliché costumes. One of the worst male costumes is a Chippendale dancer. For those who don’t know what Chippendales is, it is a group of male strippers famously known for sporting a bow tie and shirt cuffs, but of course minus the actual shirt. Can we please just put a little more effort into our costumes? Give it a 110 percent of effort, instead of 10 percent of fabric, 90 percent of skin, and about 100 percent of ego.

3. Giant Penis

This takes dressing like a dick to a whole new level. I can’t imagine the thinking process of purchasing a giant penis costume. This costume is disgusting and will chase the ladies away; basically the cock block of all costumes. Also, I don’t think I would want to walk around Waikiki with my giant dick of a friend. FYI: Don’t let this penis costume confuse you with the Chippendale costumes; those guys just act like dicks.

4. Group Costumes

Although group costumes can be fun and creative, the majority of the time, it is executed poorly and become more of an annoyance than an enjoyment. It is very rare for people to stop and say, “Man those guys are cool” to your synchronize-costume squad. Brainstorming the idea of group costumes can seem like a great idea in the beginning, but then it ends up being sidewalk-hogging hordes of Ninja Turtles, Minions, and Power Rangers marching through Waikiki. I just want to enjoy my night on Halloween without having to squeeze my way past groups of M&Ms or Starbucks cups.

5. R.I.P. Harambe

In May 2016, the 17-year-old gorilla, Harambe, was killed in the Cincinnati Zoo. This incident, as we all remember, whirled a tidal wave of anger and controversy. When #ripharambe began trending on social media outlets, it was obvious that Harambe would later be a new trending Halloween costume. The plain gorilla suit was a terrible costume choice, but now people have a whole new motivation to wear it. Stop monkeying* around and get a better costume. *That pun is just as bad as this costume. Deal with it.

6. Clowns

Remember when clowns weren’t scary? Me neither. Never in my life have I been more serious about something. Do not, I repeat, do not dress up as a clown on Halloween, or any other day for that matter. For once, please do not follow this new clown trend everyone seems to be jumping on. To those who plan on buying clown costumes and suspiciously lurking from a distance, just stop it. Return that rainbow-colored jumpsuit. Dispose of that awful red wig. Wipe off the pasty make-up. We don’t need multiple clowns running around town. We already have an orange-colored clown in a blue suit running for president. That’s scary enough.  

7. Donald Trump

Speaking of the color orange and blue suits. Just because there is a suit in your closet, it does not mean to go out and buy a cheap plastic Donald Trump mask. This costume is just a mixture of everything scary and everything bad. Dressing up as Donald Trump is a terrible, predictable, and unoriginal idea. All jokes aside, the election isn’t until November, let’s not ruin October too.